Saturday, December 15, 2007

American Gladiators 2: The Quickening

There's a new American Gladiators airing in January. I was a big, big fan of the original, but I'm a bit hesitant to embrace this new one. Are they going to have the same fun games, or are there going to be new games like "Punch to the Cunt" and "Shower Assault"?

I may have to tune in regardless, because a girl I went to school with in 5th and 6th grade is one of the Gladiators. Her name is Gina Cerano, now known as Crush. Unlike Hellga, whose voice is deeper than that of Justice (I saw them on TV), Gina is a relatively attractive girl. She used to have really wavy hair, to the point that I used to think she had a hair like a male lion's mane, and I would not have recognized her now if I didn't just look her up earlier in the year. I found out she was doing professional fighting, which is weird, and somehow less weird than American Gladiators. I dropped her a note to say hello and wish her luck with her endeavors, but she never replied, so fuck her. I hope she breaks both her legs and a contestant shits in her mouth.

If I can re-find my old yearbook, I'll scan her picture in. Not that anyone cares. Here she is from her mixed martial arts days of just a few years ago:



I fucking hate it when people I went to school with are more successful than me. This is the only one I know of, but it doesn't make it any easier. I hope she breaks both her...oh wait, I already said that.

5 comments:

May said...

you're a friggin weirdo

greg said...

She probably didn't write you back because she thought you were a douchebag in the 6th grade, you twat.

ChrisV82 said...

Or maybe she's only functionally literate. Let's be honest, either option is plausible.

xtina said...

ooh ooh please post her middle school pic...i've got to see this.

Anonymous said...

Who remembers every kid they ever went to school with? Were you even friends? Why the hell should she respond to you? Did Santa ever reply back to you?