Friday, February 29, 2008

In praise of myself

I pride myself on being aware of my faults and shortcomings, or at least trying to. That way, I can attempt to improve myself, or at least downplay the negative parts of my personality (maybe). Despite my political science undergraduate degree, I probably have an 11th grade understanding of politics. Granted, the average American probably has a 3rd grade understanding, but I could not hold up my side of an argument against more skilled, more involved political people. I could not name more than 15 or so heads of foreign states. In fact, I couldn't even name my local representatives. Yes, the election process is kind of a joke, as this mockery we call a presidential primary makes clear (nothing against the candidates per se, just the way they're being chosen), but I should really know who's making the decisions, shouldn't I?

This doesn't stop me from commenting on political matters practically everyday. For the most part, I try to keep it funny so that even if my commentary isn't up to par, I can at least pass it off as a joke, and people can have a chuckle, or fly into a rage against my progresso-liberistic beliefs. I invented the term progresso-liberistic as a nod to the phrase socio-economic, and I expect royalties if the term should catch on. Sadly, my comedy is sometimes as accurate as my politics, which means there are days when I just seem like a rambling crackpot.

There are times, however, when I really nail it. On January 17, 2006, I had a lucid moment:
Ah, yes, the great rule of law. Here are the "rules" of law for a supreme court justice -

1) Any exception you disagree with will create a slippery slope. Any exception you agree with is based on rationality.

2) Stare decisis and precedent are cool as long as it fits your personal view. It is okay to overtun case law if the majority has a different opinion.

3) You must chronically masturbate your own ego in long-winded, boring opinions, concurrences, and dissents.
Masterful. Brilliant. Accurate. And the greatest of these is love.

As the sharply named Grotesqueticle noted, "I do believe that ChrisV82 just posted the only comment on a blog of any stripe that is true, insightful, and funny no matter where you rest on the political spectrum.

"Game over!"

All hail me!

3 comments:

Gorilla Bananas said...

You wrote that on January 17 2006? Brilliant stuff, but don't you think you're living on past glories?

Jai said...

I'll hail you when you start driving a damn taxicab, maybe!

ChrisV82 said...

Mr. Bananas - Living off of past glories is part of getting older. That's how Blackburn Rovers fans, or Pittsburgh Pirates fans, swallow going to games.

Jai - Maybe I'd start driving a cab if it was more like Crazy Taxi and less like sitting in crazy traffic all day.